Comments for Bvalentine's Weblog

Comment on 20 Dead Bodies and a Red Piece of Paper by drapes

drapes — Mon, 15 Dec 2008 18:21:43 +0000

Wonderfully written Byron. This was one of the most enjoyable reads I’ve ever had teaching this class.

Comment on Poems by Anonymous

Anonymous — Thu, 13 Nov 2008 03:04:18 +0000

well i decided to do poems, but ive been just putting them in the regular blog for now. I will put my own here eventually, but all in good time. Ive got tons of work right now with the term ending. And feel free to keep me on your blogroll.

Comment on Poems by drapes

drapes — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 02:06:17 +0000

Where are they? I need more. If you decide to keep this blog after class, I’d like to add you to my blogroll if your up for it. Like your stuff bro.

Comment on Oh Brave New World, What Have You Become? by mdwyer90

mdwyer90 — Thu, 06 Nov 2008 05:12:53 +0000

Byron,
Your post was very nice. There are just a couple grammar errors and some spelling errors that need fixing but thats not a big deal. I liked your opinions about the overall story from the book and movie. You go into great detail when describing them, and that gives the reader a clear view of exactly you want to point out and what you want them to think. I agree with what you said about the movie, that they did change some things about it from the story so it could be a movie. Without those changes it would have been a very bad, and short, movie. You mentioned a book called 1984, if its anything like this i wouldnt mind reading it. Good post.

Comment on Oh Brave New World, What Have You Become? by Andrew

Andrew — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 06:57:09 +0000

Good summaries. I definitely agree that the movie shows the despair of the lives of the people, but to a certain degree. The movie and the short story definitely went in different directions in how to show an oppressive government and an “unknowingly controlled” population. The points you made were good, but I think the compare and contrast could have been expanded upon / added more detail. Overall, minor grammar and punctuation mistakes, good post and keep up the good work!

Comment on Oh Brave New World, What Have You Become? by autumn0719

autumn0719 — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 03:09:56 +0000

Byron-

I think that your post was a very good one. I love the way that you go into depth about all the things that you pointed out as satire or irony. I definitely agree with you on those points. I think that you wrote very well by going in-depth about the reasons for why they are satire. I felt that throughout your paper you were pretty much error free. I overall just always love that way that you write and are able to get out what you want to say through your writing. Good job on this one!

Comment on Oh Brave New World, What Have You Become? by mardeus

mardeus — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 02:25:18 +0000

I like your how you set up your blog it is done very well. I am not at proof reading so you probably want to go to the WRC to get a better idea of what you should work on. To me the blog is done well and there are very few minor errors from what I could spot. I do agree with Grant about your blog.

Comment on Oh Brave New World, What Have You Become? by Grant Goodrich

Grant Goodrich — Wed, 05 Nov 2008 01:02:46 +0000

Some of your sentences could use commas, but otherwise this was very well written. I agree with your comparison of the movie and short story. The short story was much more extreme compared to the movie and I agree with you in that it shouldn’t be taken literally. Watching the movie reminded me of the book 1984 too, and I also thought it was more serious than the short story. Good job with this post.

Comment on Material Culture by drapes

drapes — Sun, 02 Nov 2008 01:15:45 +0000

Examples of the comma use for the pause effect that I mention in your last paper (inserted into your original text with parentheses):

“Because of our own desires and demands(,) our society’s perceptions have influenced technology greatly.”

“Smaller, faster and cheaper are some of the core consumer demands(,) but qualities such as integration and convenience are also sought after.”

“When extended(,) the Flash Dive’s dimensions increase to 7 cm x 2 cm x 1 cm.”

Your proofreading suffered a bit towards the end, and I think you might have done something with the nickname “thumb drive”, in your analysis, particularly with the comment about the generation’s use of its thumbs. All that said, given the difficulty inherent in choosing an object like this, I think you did a fantastic job with this. You are an excellent writer Byron, don’t let proofreading derail your talents.

Comment on Material Culture by Steve Naert

Steve Naert — Mon, 20 Oct 2008 11:22:43 +0000

Nice job writing about a particularly difficult object. Your description was spot on. I also thought that the way you chose to wrap it all up in the end was a very efficient and interesting way to do so. Nice work.